I want something good to eat. I would like to sit down at a dinner table with family and friends and just have a decent meal. The only problem with that is I can't because I have been working everyday. Don't get me wrong. I am happy to have a job. Thankful to God and more than gratefu
l to not have to file unemployment.( Lord knows who came up with those figures). Anyway, I am getting very tired. Just exhausted and I am more than willing to help out but, damn. I have no time for anything. And everyone says " Well the money is great. " I retort " I can't spend it if I'm dead." Money isn't everything. Quality of life is so much more important to me. Since losing my mom, even more so. I want to be able to live each day, happily like it's my last. I'm not asking for wine and song and parties. Just a chance to relax and do what I want to do. Time to see my dad. Chat with my family and friends. Spend quality time with them. I joined the Eastern Star organization so I could really do some work in the community. How can I if I can't attend half of the functions? GOD GRANT ME SERENTIY... PATIENCE... I know and this too shall pass. Right now I am willing to settle for a good meal. Collards and Cornbread...yeah!!!!
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Love Is You
Yesterday was my 45th birthday. I started it off with good friends toasting me and having a blast. I am blessed. Last year at this time I really was not in the mood to celebrate, anything... they say time heals all wounds. Although, I can't think of any amount of time that would heal this wound I am getting better. Stronger. I have so much love in my life. The love of family has sustained me physically and mentally. The love of friends both near and far has strengthened me. So I picked this song because I feel that I am love, so filled with love for others and so filled with love from others. Today, I feel so thankful to God for all that he has given me. For the things I overlook and forget to say "Thank you" for out loud. So Blessed!!!
Friday, September 18, 2009
Never Would Have Made It
Yesterday was my fathers 72nd birthday. I am so blessed to say that. I wasn't given the opportunity to really appreciate how blessed yesterday, because our family was hit with some hard news. My brothers best friend, killed himself. Even as I type these words I find it so very hard to believe.I was already hurt by the fact that he was gone, but my brother is the one who found him. I believe that hurt me even more because I couldn't imagine having to find my best friend dead. I can't imagine finding anyone dead. But for someone I love,it would devastate me.
People always say. " Just know that they aren't suffering anymore" That is what I pray for most. I pray that he is not suffering. I pray that whatever it was that led him to take his own life is truly over now. The hardest thing I know for me will be watching my brother go through this. I hurt more, because I hurt for him. But this too will pass.
I'm trying to be strong, I haven't spoken a word to him. Not yet because I know when I talk to him or see him I will fall apart. I have been blessed enough in my life not to know death. Not to have to miss love ones or bury them. I have only attended 1 funeral in my life. This will be the second.
I thank God for delivering me from my pain. For seeing me through when I couldn't see. For making a way, when there was no way. For giving me the strength I needed to go on. I pray he is at peace.
Live your life to the fullest Stay Blessed!
People always say. " Just know that they aren't suffering anymore" That is what I pray for most. I pray that he is not suffering. I pray that whatever it was that led him to take his own life is truly over now. The hardest thing I know for me will be watching my brother go through this. I hurt more, because I hurt for him. But this too will pass.
I'm trying to be strong, I haven't spoken a word to him. Not yet because I know when I talk to him or see him I will fall apart. I have been blessed enough in my life not to know death. Not to have to miss love ones or bury them. I have only attended 1 funeral in my life. This will be the second.
I thank God for delivering me from my pain. For seeing me through when I couldn't see. For making a way, when there was no way. For giving me the strength I needed to go on. I pray he is at peace.
Live your life to the fullest Stay Blessed!
Saturday, June 20, 2009
My Man
Today I fell out with one of my closes friends. Why? Her man, not mine hers. I hate to fall out with anyone but especially when it's foolishness. By the way, I have kicked my man to the curb. It just wasn't working out and NO it wasn't me. Back to me and my friend.
I spoke to someone and told them the whole scenario and they feel that I am correct. I feel that i am correct. I just have to get my friend to see that I am correct. She is a bit stubborn and I am too and I love her , but shit. Right is right and wrong is wrong. Her man was dead wrong. ( Nothing like trying to approach me or anything like that) but the situation was wrong. So in an effort to get him to think about the situation I spoke with her. It's amazing how friends can flip. I understand that it is her man and she has to keep her home happy, but damn don't flip on me. That is all that I am saying.
I am saying if you see he is wrong don't try to rationalize no crazy shit. PERIOD!!!
I spoke to someone and told them the whole scenario and they feel that I am correct. I feel that i am correct. I just have to get my friend to see that I am correct. She is a bit stubborn and I am too and I love her , but shit. Right is right and wrong is wrong. Her man was dead wrong. ( Nothing like trying to approach me or anything like that) but the situation was wrong. So in an effort to get him to think about the situation I spoke with her. It's amazing how friends can flip. I understand that it is her man and she has to keep her home happy, but damn don't flip on me. That is all that I am saying.
I am saying if you see he is wrong don't try to rationalize no crazy shit. PERIOD!!!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
You Are My Friend
I am a people person. I love interaction with different types of people and feel that I can get along with anyone if given the chance. I was having a discussion with a person who informed me that he didn't have any friends. He said he only had acquaintances and he thought when people called themselves friends, they basically expected things from you.
I thought how sad. I have friends, true blue, do or die, ride or die, down for me friends. People that I can lean on tell my business, fall out with, party with, cry with and know they will always be there. I guess I am blessed.
My whole point to him was, what kind of friend are you? I have aligned myself with people who treat me the way I treat them. I feel if you act like a friend then I will treat you like one. I have had to let people that were my so-called friends go.
They did not treat me with the same level of respect that I gave them. They did not respect the relationship and therefore lost the title of "friend". They could no longer be anything to me, because once I extend my hand in friendship and you do something to soil that relationship in any way I have lost the trust that is needed to have a true friendship. Some people feel that is harsh. That forgiveness is needed. I do forgive. Don't get me wrong. Before I decide to end a friendship I look at the circumstances which led me to consider ending it. If I deem them harsh enough then it's over. I wish you well.
As I tried to explain this to him, it felt like he understood. But never having a friend in his life was a lot for me to take in. I asked him again, What kind of friend are you? He basically said he considered himself a good friend having gone out of his way many, many times only to be used. I told him he had to decide what types he choose to call his friends as well. Because friends don't use you. They don't call only when they need things and they don't abuse you in any way. A friend uplifts you when your down. Raising you even higher when your up. They are proud of you and feel nothing but love for you and truly want the best for you.
It was a bit much for him. People like this truly do exist. I know because I am blessed to have them in my life. My prayers that this young man will experience this in his lifetime..
Stay Blessed!
I thought how sad. I have friends, true blue, do or die, ride or die, down for me friends. People that I can lean on tell my business, fall out with, party with, cry with and know they will always be there. I guess I am blessed.
My whole point to him was, what kind of friend are you? I have aligned myself with people who treat me the way I treat them. I feel if you act like a friend then I will treat you like one. I have had to let people that were my so-called friends go.
They did not treat me with the same level of respect that I gave them. They did not respect the relationship and therefore lost the title of "friend". They could no longer be anything to me, because once I extend my hand in friendship and you do something to soil that relationship in any way I have lost the trust that is needed to have a true friendship. Some people feel that is harsh. That forgiveness is needed. I do forgive. Don't get me wrong. Before I decide to end a friendship I look at the circumstances which led me to consider ending it. If I deem them harsh enough then it's over. I wish you well.
As I tried to explain this to him, it felt like he understood. But never having a friend in his life was a lot for me to take in. I asked him again, What kind of friend are you? He basically said he considered himself a good friend having gone out of his way many, many times only to be used. I told him he had to decide what types he choose to call his friends as well. Because friends don't use you. They don't call only when they need things and they don't abuse you in any way. A friend uplifts you when your down. Raising you even higher when your up. They are proud of you and feel nothing but love for you and truly want the best for you.
It was a bit much for him. People like this truly do exist. I know because I am blessed to have them in my life. My prayers that this young man will experience this in his lifetime..
Stay Blessed!
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Nothing From Nothing
I don't have children, so I am reaching as far as what "I" would do. I know how I think I would raise my child. I know how I was raised. I know my tolerance level. I have friends with step children that are wrecking their lives and marriages. I know from listening to them, I no longer wish to be in a relationship with a man who has under aged children anymore. At my age that is really, really pushing it.This is a strong statement considering who much I love children. But I am watching my friends lives crumble before my eyes. Not because of money, miscommunication or infidelity, but because of the step children.
It's sad to watch because other than the children, these people have wonderful relationships. I understand my friends frustration and yet I understand their partner. No one wants to be put in a situation to choose between their spouse or their children. I understand when they are just wanting "peace" and not to make any waves and keep everyone happy. But you can't keep everyone happy. Someone is going to have a problem.
My friends feel unappreciated, one has been physically abused by a child. The other mentally abused not only by the child but their mother as well. I am at a lost as to what to say to them anymore. I listen. I ask them to talk with their spouses about how they feel. I know in my heart that both of these women love the step children. We don't have any Cinderella stories here. But the children, for some reason do not like them, nor do they respect the fact that their fathers love these women. I know that the mother's of these children are fueling the fires.
So how do you work this out? How do you keep your home life happy and as well adjusted and functional as you can when you have step children who act like they have 3 sixes on their skull?
I pray their relationships endure these troubled times. I pray these children realize that they are in the best possible place they could be. I pray that God give these families strength and wisdom.
Because....
I don't have children, but I know my tolerance level
It's sad to watch because other than the children, these people have wonderful relationships. I understand my friends frustration and yet I understand their partner. No one wants to be put in a situation to choose between their spouse or their children. I understand when they are just wanting "peace" and not to make any waves and keep everyone happy. But you can't keep everyone happy. Someone is going to have a problem.
My friends feel unappreciated, one has been physically abused by a child. The other mentally abused not only by the child but their mother as well. I am at a lost as to what to say to them anymore. I listen. I ask them to talk with their spouses about how they feel. I know in my heart that both of these women love the step children. We don't have any Cinderella stories here. But the children, for some reason do not like them, nor do they respect the fact that their fathers love these women. I know that the mother's of these children are fueling the fires.
So how do you work this out? How do you keep your home life happy and as well adjusted and functional as you can when you have step children who act like they have 3 sixes on their skull?
I pray their relationships endure these troubled times. I pray these children realize that they are in the best possible place they could be. I pray that God give these families strength and wisdom.
Because....
I don't have children, but I know my tolerance level
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Party All The Time
My girls birthday was this past week so when she said, " Wendy you should come up here." I thought cool. A mini vacation. I could go chill in VA and get my mind right. The plan was to leave work at 3 and be there around 7. Seven-thirty the latest. When I pulled out at FIVE I realized that I may not make the party.Yet, I pressed on, despite the fact that she moved from Oceanview and I haven't been to the new place. So here I am trying to read my directions and drive. All while noticing that my surroundings look similar to that movie Wrong Turn. Not one to be caught by deranged,cannibals, I decided to toss the directions and find a main Hwy.
My friend has just turned 44 and I swear she could pass for 30. I told her she should bottle whatever she is working with. She makes me sick. She is a karaoke fool so of course her party was held at a Karaoke Bar. Sis can blow too.When that ended we went back to her place and sat up until 4 A.M. catching up. This was her weekend so I told her whatever you want to do, I'm game. She decided she wanted to go to the some museum and Colonial Williamsburg(Where she basically walked me to death). Did I MENTION I came from work? But, I didn't want to be the pooper left at home,so I went. On the way back she decided we should go see Spiderman. Which I thought was cool but my body was like. What the hell is wrong with you? After the movie, we went out to eat, then back to Karaoke. Damn I'm tired. My girl is not only older than me but she also has much more energy. Even after all this, she went into work today. I don't have to be back until tomorrow and I'm already thinking of excuses.
I used to be able to hang with her like this back in the day. Not anymore. When I got home today I slept for five hours straight. And I still feel tired. I know I burned both ends this weekend but, somehow I feel like I'm losing cool points.
My friend has just turned 44 and I swear she could pass for 30. I told her she should bottle whatever she is working with. She makes me sick. She is a karaoke fool so of course her party was held at a Karaoke Bar. Sis can blow too.When that ended we went back to her place and sat up until 4 A.M. catching up. This was her weekend so I told her whatever you want to do, I'm game. She decided she wanted to go to the some museum and Colonial Williamsburg(Where she basically walked me to death). Did I MENTION I came from work? But, I didn't want to be the pooper left at home,so I went. On the way back she decided we should go see Spiderman. Which I thought was cool but my body was like. What the hell is wrong with you? After the movie, we went out to eat, then back to Karaoke. Damn I'm tired. My girl is not only older than me but she also has much more energy. Even after all this, she went into work today. I don't have to be back until tomorrow and I'm already thinking of excuses.
I used to be able to hang with her like this back in the day. Not anymore. When I got home today I slept for five hours straight. And I still feel tired. I know I burned both ends this weekend but, somehow I feel like I'm losing cool points.
Saturday, February 16, 2002
Note to self... Get missing, should Ronnie ever move again!
I haven't sung in awhile. Not in front of an audience. I know my neighbors are wishing I either...1) cut a demo or 2) shut up! I'm missing my Diva moments... craving that attention....I'm having Karaoke withdrawals...Starting to feel like Duck( I aint sang in years)...I have to go somewhere and sing my heart out!
I haven't sung in awhile. Not in front of an audience. I know my neighbors are wishing I either...1) cut a demo or 2) shut up! I'm missing my Diva moments... craving that attention....I'm having Karaoke withdrawals...Starting to feel like Duck( I aint sang in years)...I have to go somewhere and sing my heart out!
Wednesday, February 06, 2002
I have had to let friendships go, because they were not healthy relationships. The person wasn't what I perceive to be a friend.
This is nothing like that, this wasn't done to me. What do you do when someone does something so outrageous, you just cannot believe what they have done? When you discuss it with them, when you express your disappointment all you get is a " well this is me." I can't trust that. I can't trust you anymore... I guess that's what hurts me the most.
This is nothing like that, this wasn't done to me. What do you do when someone does something so outrageous, you just cannot believe what they have done? When you discuss it with them, when you express your disappointment all you get is a " well this is me." I can't trust that. I can't trust you anymore... I guess that's what hurts me the most.
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