Thursday, July 18, 2013

Scream

Ok I have lost some weight. Cool right. Now I am dealing with sagging skin. I feel like a marshmallow. A brown, squishy, marshmallow.Now I have to  do exercises to tighten but,  not get too bulky. So I won't look like a large Michelon tire baby.  At least when I was bigger I was firm. I didn't have all this jingling baby going on. I'M DOING THE WORK MAN!!!, but it is so hard. I knew going in that the process would be long and tough and some days I feel like. ...Forget it. I have to be honest. I feel like running out and buying a carton of butter pecan and eating the whole thing. Dairy Queen has been blowing my tv screen up! Them and every restaurant has a meal special with some delicious looking entree dancing across my screen.I rationalize it in my mind at the time that everyone is not supposed to be thin. Then I come back to myself , because I am not trying to be thin. I am trying to be healthy. I am trying dance,  and walk a flight of stairs without feeling winded. I want to be comfortable in my clothes, not pulling and snatching. Whatever size that is.

With weight loss the fat that was on your body also begins to shift. So when I put my clothes on, I'm like what the hell? I'm not hating on anyone, you should feel comfortable in the skin you are in. No matter the size, but right  is right and wrong is just... wrong.  I am also losing the weight unevenly and one of these things is not like the other!!! Who the hell does this!!! My mother used to tell me .." Only you Wendy" How true these words seem. I talk to others who are on a weight lost journey and I have yet to hear anyone else complain of this. My feet lost weight!!! Yeah, that is EXACTLY where I needed to lose.Maybe I will resort to wearing coverups. Until this body decides to compromise with me.

I also have had  the most tiring week, trying to explain my position on the Trayvon Martin case and verdict to those who are unwilling or unable to understand my frustration. I'm at the point now where I realize that I am beating a dead horse and I am no longer trying to have a logical conversation with these people. It's hard to believe that some people that I have known  for most of my life are so bigoted and narrow-minded. I had some inkling that they were during the Obama campaign. This case has definitely drawn the line on their position and sadly, I understand even more just how divided this country is.

I've ranted enough...Be blessed peeps!!!

1 comment:

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